Now we are six

[hirez]

Yesterday, I bought a case of wine for the first time in aaaages.

That sort of thing makes me feel strangely grown up.

The last time I purchased any quantity of plonk, I had to leave it at ma & pa's while I was briefly and expectedly sans domicile. When I went round to recover it, there were two bottles left from the original n (three, I think) cases... Hey ho.

Anyway. You know those annoying lists of 'Things you should have done by age [number I'll never see again, which is probably what makes them most annoying. As if I needed to be reminded that my life is cheerfully out of step with what people who work for glossy magazines think of as 'reality'.]'?

Suggest some. I dare you. (Other than 'fuck off' or 'Stick your head up your jacksie'. One day I'll stop interleaving my life with lines from Marc Riley & the Creepers live LPs. Maybe. Or maybe I'll swap back to Big Black: 'You can't breathe? You should feel lucky there are people who can't see, asshole!')

Comments

[hazeii.livejournal.com]

1) Get the house wired for 100mbs (just as everyone else goes wireless) (11+)

2) Compile Firefox from source (18+)

3) Read the paper in Nature about the 2003 Pinot Noir revealing the
biggest temperature anomaly since records began in 1370 (30+).

4) Upgrade an MS operating system (without losing all your applications)
(Age: Aleph zero++)

[mr-tom.livejournal.com]

Yesterday, I bought a case of wine

[insert blokey booze-drinking joke here]

You know those annoying lists of 'Things...

Yes. The Grauniad had an article on the New Scientist's one. Which looked interesting, except there was no link to the original article. Which doesn't even appear to be on the NS website. So the whole thing was a puff piece for the magazine. Bugger.

And while I'm on a rant about interesting articles that turn out to be a waste of time: there's one on the BBC about a Palestinian hip-hop outfit. The article claims that they are a huge success on the interwebthingy, but Esteemed Search Engines and Nefarious P2P Networks claim never to have heard of them. Natch, there is no link on Auntie's webshite.

Anyways: Some things to do on a rainy day:

* Tell your boss to go fuck himself.
* Set fire to a flag of an oppressive state. (Berkshire, f'rinstance)
* Key a Chelsea Tractor.
* Write a porn-uploading program to be rid of irritating cow-irkers.
* Blow up the Houses of Parliament.
* Eat something unidentifiable.
* Invent a children's parlour game that involves petroleum, cotton wool, a hobby horse, and a sliver of flint.
* Grafitti a yuppie.
* Donate someone else's organs.
* Drive a flatbed through a supermarket. (Bonus points for having a band on the back. Double bonus if it's something ironic, like the Clash, or Wurzels)
* Deleat all of Livejournal and the rest of the interweb for good measure.
* Invade Poland.

[aeia.livejournal.com]

But.. but.. you've done the get a mortgage and get married bits from the glossy mags...

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But.. but.. you've done the get a mortgage and get married bits from the glossy mags... <fx: runs away and hides>..

Adds:
Must get motorbike before 40 or else it will look like mid life crisi thing.

[girfan.livejournal.com]

I think an old Land Rover comes before getting a motorbike...

[hazeii.livejournal.com]

Must get motorbike before 40 or else it will look like mid life crisi thing

Eh, you've been a bit precocious on the midlife crisis thingy, then!

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Bike? Good plan.

The glossy mags say all sorts of things, but I've yet to see one that recommends taking acid and then driving a Landie home with only a brief stop to create a crop-circle with it.

(Though that may have been two separate instances. Allegedly.)

[jarkman.livejournal.com]

Learn to drive a bus.
Learn to drive a racing car.
Build a house with your own hands.
Dig a large hole with a pick and shovel.
Get lost in Tokyo.
Found and subsequently disband an art movement.
Find and subsequently discard a bowel movement.
Develop your first disease of old age.
Walk for a week, eating nothing but what you carry.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Go bus-racing (Hm. Karting?)
Dig a large hole and put a bus in it
Found an art-movement concerned with digging holes
Cut a car up and put it through a letterbox.

[jarkman.livejournal.com]

(e) All of the above.

Forwards, Comrade! Raise high the confusingly-designed banner of the revolution!

[aoakley.livejournal.com]

21: Been to a foreign country

24: Had a full-time job for more than six months

25: Been interviewed (or been an interviewer) on radio, telly or in print (not a phone-in competition), or had your own works broadcast/published

27: Have a "drinks cabinet" (even if it is just a cupboard or a box under the stairs) which contains more alcohol than you could feasibly drink in one night, even if you went on a "total bender"

30: Been significantly involved in the organisation of a large live event

31: Stopped going to nightclubs (I really can't stress this one enough. You may think you're "still cool" but the young'uns are laughing at you, grandad)

35: Bought a car or a house (excludes people living in stupidly crowded areas, eg. London)

40: Had kids or been seriously involved in the bringing up of someone else's (eg. babysitting for friends/family, community volunteer etc)

Let 'em laugh

[sarah-mum.livejournal.com]

I can tick 7/8 of yours, so does that mean I can get away with No.31 if don't try and claim 'cool' ?

Re: Let 'em laugh

[inulro.livejournal.com]

Like I care if "the kids" are laughing at me. If anything, that's a bonus!

As to (21), I'd done that when I was 3. Though I still haven't been to South America, which I've been dying to do since I was 8.

[sarah-mum.livejournal.com]

Given up worrying about whether you can tick all the things on those lists?