Horticultural disturbance

[hirez]

You know the strawberry plants that I have mentioned every few months or so?

Still emitting tiny yet staggeringly flavoured fruit.

In November.

I am becoming mildly disturbed by this.

If I wake up on Christmas morning to find a growbag of strawberry plants squatting at the end of the bed and brandishing fruit at me, I'll only be slightly surprised. (In a 'I'm sure I locked the back door last night' manner. I won't even start to think about how a mob of plants managed to beetle up the stairs.)

Comments

[quercus.livejournal.com]

Are they making noises yet?

Little rattly-stick noises?

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I get the distinct impression that should I listen closely, I'll get some tiny strawberries stuffed in my ear as a present.

[liz-lowlife.livejournal.com]

:o)
Mmmmmmm Triffid jam...

[bogwitch64.livejournal.com]

Magic strawberries, huh? Sounds like something out of the 60's. ;)

[sola.livejournal.com]

Propagation will be vital with this one, i think.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I've intended for some time to reward the set of plants by moving them somewhere with proper soil. The vague plan was to do this in the depths of winter when they were most dormant so the shock wouldn't kill them.

I think they need a wheeled chariot now.

[ingenue-the.livejournal.com]

Dear Gardeners Question Time,
We planted strawbs this year although I think our nasturtiums may have eaten them. Is that normal?
Yours, confused of Ilford

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Dear Ms. Ilford,
Not much happened when I planted the things originally and I expected them to expire last winter. They survived for spite, I think. That and all the slugs being killed by the cold.

I should start a website called 'Your questions answered by chaps with sheds'.

[(Anonymous)]

かえるちゃんは、ほんとうに今週、東京に来るのですか？

(mechanical translation)

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Frog tea did this week really, do you come to Tokyo?

The architecture of your conservatory never fails to astound and delight. The less said about that business with the vicar's wife the better, however. Minty.

Re: (mechanical translation)

[quercus.livejournal.com]

John, do you write your own spam too?

Re: (mechanical translation)

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I have it delivered. Most of it is rather poor quality, though.

Will sir be requiring volunteer sprocket-herders next spring?

[aoakley.livejournal.com]

Ours gave fruit until the end of October. A tiny amount of fruit, mind, and at 3 quid a plant they have to be the most expensive strawberries in the world. It would have probably been cheaper to have driven to London and bought them from Wimbledon court number one.

[mimmimmim.livejournal.com]

Well, if they're alpines, maybe they like the cold.