V.21, V.22bis, V.34, go!
Sep. 23rd, 2004 02:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hirezA request: Can anyone point me at a sample (wav, mp3, whatever) of a fax/modem answer tone? We're currently being plagued by what appears to be a misconfigured autodialer - the answering machine was full of blank messages with no return number when we returned from our recent perigrinations - and I wish to hack up a message that will confound both machines and telemarketers.
Of course, if I were any sort of proper hacker, I'd knock up something with a spare PC and a confusing voicemail (oh, how I detest that term and the terrible industry of ugly homunculi that supports it) menu: "If you are a telemarketer, press 5... [*neep*] ... Please sod off. Really. I know you're just doing a job so you can feed and clothe your children, and I bear you no personal ill will, but have you stopped to consider the dreadful human cost extracted by the demons in human-suits that employ you? They debase the joy of communication and you are their tool. Have a nice day..."
Meanwhile, in the vaguely-related land of computer-generated skronk and blorp, we find this, which details how one may turn Fruityloops into a passable imitation of a modular analogue synth. I've had a quick furtle with one tiny part and had the thing create a pleasing racket within seconds. Those with musical talent will probably be able to bosh out a couple of albums by teatime.
[ I was going to ramble a lot more about the works of young master Stross, but I've had no sleep and I don't believe my talents work in the book reviewing direction. Save that there's a definite Culture influence there, but the tech is cheerfully nuts-and-bolts instead of Banksie's regal handwave. However it doesn't dive off into tedium like the seriously hard-SF mob do. If they're the impenetrable documentation for a brutally ugly CCITT-defined API, and IMB is the powerpoint slideware for some interesting tech you're not going to be allowed to play with, then yer man's work is the theory of operation and troubleshooting guide for the Philips KT3 chassis. ]
Of course, if I were any sort of proper hacker, I'd knock up something with a spare PC and a confusing voicemail (oh, how I detest that term and the terrible industry of ugly homunculi that supports it) menu: "If you are a telemarketer, press 5... [*neep*] ... Please sod off. Really. I know you're just doing a job so you can feed and clothe your children, and I bear you no personal ill will, but have you stopped to consider the dreadful human cost extracted by the demons in human-suits that employ you? They debase the joy of communication and you are their tool. Have a nice day..."
Meanwhile, in the vaguely-related land of computer-generated skronk and blorp, we find this, which details how one may turn Fruityloops into a passable imitation of a modular analogue synth. I've had a quick furtle with one tiny part and had the thing create a pleasing racket within seconds. Those with musical talent will probably be able to bosh out a couple of albums by teatime.
[ I was going to ramble a lot more about the works of young master Stross, but I've had no sleep and I don't believe my talents work in the book reviewing direction. Save that there's a definite Culture influence there, but the tech is cheerfully nuts-and-bolts instead of Banksie's regal handwave. However it doesn't dive off into tedium like the seriously hard-SF mob do. If they're the impenetrable documentation for a brutally ugly CCITT-defined API, and IMB is the powerpoint slideware for some interesting tech you're not going to be allowed to play with, then yer man's work is the theory of operation and troubleshooting guide for the Philips KT3 chassis. ]
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no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 06:59 am (UTC)Genius. If you get hold of one, may I take a copy, please?
no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 07:04 am (UTC)Summary: Your best bet is to temporarily plug in a fax machine/fax modem; if you receive what they're trying to send you, at least you'll know who to knock off the Xmas card list.
(I assume you're tried '1471' on the affected line?)
no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 07:20 am (UTC)I could dig out the backup Courier/v34, and I think I've still got some shonky modem card with a generic Rockwell chipset - both of those should do fax or modem... But at the moment the 'concoct a message with some whistling in to see if it whistles back' option is looking the simplest.
I wonder if I can still whistle at the correct pitch...
no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 07:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 07:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 09:17 am (UTC)Andrew.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 10:17 am (UTC)We'll have some of *that*.
May I also recommend you have a look at the Nord Modular range (http://www.clavia.se/nordmodular/) because it *is* a modular synth with a PC front-end and is *marvellous* and also that you try to grab an 'evaluation copy' of Reason, which is mostly cack, but becomes fun when you hit the tab key and turn the beastie around to show all the cabling, which you can gleefully fuck with in a modular style.
Ableton Live 4 is rocking my world, but for entirely different reasons, and I'm disconcerted by its spreadsheet style approach. A little like doing the accounts with VERY broken drum loops.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 11:09 am (UTC)stross
Date: 2004-10-08 03:31 am (UTC)Must remember to look up Stross after the weekend...