How I wrote cat-piss man

[hirez]

(This is probably not a con report, because I have no idea what one of those is and I'm of a mood to actively avoid finding out.)

Anyway. Eastercon.

Interesting.

It's obviously going to make no sense at all to you lot, largely because it made no sense at all to me, but after the first couple of days of panels it had been made very plain that large small[1] wedges of fandom and most some[1] aspiring SF awfuls would be far happier if Teh Interbets, and by extension the likes of me, would just bugger off and cease to exist.

Weblogging is wrong, authors keeping websites is wrong, writing stuff and putting it on websites is wrong and will lead to the downfall of civilisation, the expiry of the market for short fiction is All My Fault and I should don sackcloth and ashes and be paraded in the streets in a cart pulled by Tim Berners-Lee as the editorial staff of Interzone lob fruit and anatomically impossible suggestions.

(I may exaggerate for the purposes of dramatic wossname, but only very slightly.)

Luckily pnh and CDoctorow pitched up today to speak sensibly and at length, and of course the mood in that panel session was largely spod-positive, but I can't help wishing those chaps had been able to experience the luddism abroad elsewhere. Although, perhaps not. I guess because I'm new to this game, I'm not used to dealing with the attitudes of Ludd-Gang and it's all a bit of a shock to the system. They've been doing it for a while and for them it's the surly background jabbering of gaslamp-lighters considering their future.

Still, it did make me feel all punk rock and transgressive and everything.

(I'm also going to have to come back to this and rewrite it with shorter sentences so it sounds somewhat less spittle-flecked.)

[1] After some reflection, some beer, some more wandering around and some commentary here.

Comments

[moral-vacuum.livejournal.com]

For an ostensibly forward-looking genre, there is a certain irony here.

[eljaydaly.livejournal.com]

Spittle is good!

Did you get to spend any time with Patrick or Cory? Or were they swamped and crazy-busy?

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I was told (via girfan) to finish the bloody book. And rightly so.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

It's Trads vs. Cybers. And I'm from the glitch-techno faction.

[eljaydaly.livejournal.com]

That's great! They're still thinking about you.

Huzzah!

(And finish the bloody book!)

[avocadovpx.livejournal.com]

It seems you've inadvertently written a con report. Or a web browser.

I suppose that one of the things a writer of SF should understand is how it feels to be a stranger in a strange land, by which I don't mean a used Heinlein paperback. (Or maybe I do.)

Usually one doesn't expect the Fannish Inquisitionto get that feeling from inside fandom, though.

[dfable.livejournal.com]

I've heard the downfall of civilization is neigh. I better go buy an umbrella.

[athenais.livejournal.com]

Cons are naff, but sometimes all your friends will turn up at this or that one, so you may as well go along and have a drink. The small, focused ones are much better than the national or world cons for those who like their fandom in small, focused doses.

[avocadovpx.livejournal.com]

>> small, focused doses

Yes, remember: short, controlled bursts.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

A Thursday in October, I understand. Probably around a quarter to four.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

... Having written that and then gone for a pint of ale (Real Ale appears to be a major food group, which is cheering) and a bit of a potter round, the rest of the day is being pretty damn cosmic.

[inulro.livejournal.com]

You're not just saying that to make me feel better about not being able to go?

[pnh.livejournal.com]

"Weblogging is wrong, authors keeping websites is wrong, writing stuff and putting it on websites is wrong and will lead to the downfall of civilisation, the expiry of the market for short fiction is All My Fault and I should don sackcloth and ashes and be paraded in the streets in a cart pulled by Tim Berners-Lee as the editorial staff of Interzone lob fruit and anatomically impossible suggestions."

Well, that explain why I never actually saw you--we were at different conventions! I never heard any of this stuff; I just had a long series of conversations with people who have sensible things to say on these issues. (You would have particularly enjoyed listening to me, China Mieville, and Paul Cornell singing harmony over lunch. China was exceptionally vivid on the subject of writers who object to the trade in used books.)

[nalsa.livejournal.com]

So, you're not coming up to the Bratfud thing next year, then?

(/is seriously considering applying for panels about CC licensing.)

[athenais.livejournal.com]

CAMRA ftw!

I go to conventions infrequently nowadays, selecting the smaller cons with high concentration of friends (like Potlatch) or Worldcons where vast numbers of people will provide a festival-like atmosphere.

[drumiller.livejournal.com]

*clap*

finish the sub book. each time I come across a really good comment on arocket about old Soviet wherewithal, I think "JHR FTW!"

[drumiller.livejournal.com]

Well, if we can convince enough of the tribe to gather, we can fabricate our own reality. I'm convinced cons are all about who you know there, the new people you meet there, and the inter-dimenional intersections of all the expectations fitting into a limited plane.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

The world is filled with fine scrap and mad buildings. It's a shame to waste them.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

You'd have hated every second. It's been dreadful. Really. At no point have I run from the dealer's room with an armful of old John Brunner books, cackling gleefully.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Every time I've seen you, you've been deep in arm-waving conversations.

I think Ludd-Gang are more or less a subset of the Unpublished and one step away from Rejectomancy. I wished strongly for a 'citation needed' sign during the one panel, but I'm not entirely sure those there assembled would have got that joke.

You're right. I would.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I don't know yet. Possibly.

[inulro.livejournal.com]

Actually, the two words that convinced me I should definitely NOT go were "dealers' room". Because broke or not, I have zero self control when it comes to buying books.

[badnewswade.livejournal.com]

I've never really understood why old media has such a bug up its' ass about the internets. When all the ranting and raving has been done, when all the buttons have been pressed and the trousers have been dirtied, it always seems to boil down to one thing: They're desperately afraid that they will be superseded; that their stuff isn't that good and their little club houses and cliques will be battered down by sheer numbers of people like me who create but aren't well connected or persistent enough to get into the Big Boy's Club.

The problem with this insecurity is that if amateur stuff really is as bad as old media types insist, then they have nothing to worry about, do they? Most people prefer to read proper books written by proper writers, and there really is no reason for these types to feel threataned at all. I certainly wouldn't compare myself to "real" SF writers for a moment; most amateur, internet based writers are just doing it for the pleasure of telling a story.

It's kind of sad that the sci-fi establishment feels this way though. Or that anyone can even claim to be "the sci-fi establishment".

[redcountess]

It's incredibly odd, because I know for a fact that many of the panelists (including the big named ones like Stross and Gaiman), some of whom moral_vacuum and I know personally (I'm thinking T, K and A, D), are prolific bloggers!

[redcountess]

Oh *those* people </Christopher Lee's voice> - I'm sure if sclerotic_rings were here he'd have a few choice words on The Great UnwashedUnpublished, and their Entitlement Brat beliefs ;)

[redcountess]

From those that I know in the community, it's not that large a subset, thank heavens.

[blue-condition.livejournal.com]

t'internet has meant the end of Fandom As Tribe and opened it up to people looking in from the outside and giggling at it.

I love science fiction.
I am not, never have been and never will be 'a fan'.
(I've probably read too much of the stuff to be 'a fan' these days.)

[hirez.livejournal.com]

You do read Making Light (http://wyrdsmiths.blogspot.com/2007/10/writers-index-to-making-light.html), don't you?

That's not a pointer to the main weblog, that's an index + commentary to the (SF) writing specific bits.

It's not 'the establishment' (or even an establishment) but a mob of daft sods who have some very odd and very fixed ideas about why they're not getting published and why us internet johnnies are queering the pitch.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Well, quite.

However, the way I think it worked is that the set of people who broadly agree with the way that Messrs. Gaiman, Stross & Doctorow do their various things are going to turn up to the panels that include those chaps, weblog live from the back of the audience and generally be spod positive.

The other set of people are aspiring writers and therefore Interzone (et al) subscribers. Although they're the people Warren Ellis talked about, they firmly reject his heresy. They're the ones who'll turn up for panels on How To Get Published and (The lack of) UK Short Fiction Market and mither on to each other about how the internet's spoiled everything and bringing back New Worlds would Solve Things.

In exactly the same way that Trads are a bit thin on the ground at InFest.

[badnewswade.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I just seem to remember a similar meme coming out of some media twit a while back - something along the lines of "ZOMG teh internets am a threat to society because it involves the plebs in content generation and they're so ghastly and ordinary and don't have proper degrees and aren't real journalists / writers / actors / filmmakers!1!!1 And everything non-profressional content creators do is utter crap anyway so there!eleventy!!1!"

It really was that flecked in spittle and green ink, ironically it read like the sort of thing you expect to find on Indymedia or some nutbag's blog rather than the Beeb or wherever.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Oh, FFS. What a maroon.

Sturgeon's Law applies to the output of the BBC/Guardian/Desmond's Asian Babes meejah empire as much as it applies to W. Fred Boggis and his Talking Weblog live and direct from beautiful downtown Bedminster.

(Someone please start a weblog called that)

If the bloody Nathans would stop producing such utter arse and come up with something as useful and entertaining as bOing^2, then they might have a point.

[girfan.livejournal.com]

There were a few dealers who had loads of great books for silly prices. I found one book I've been looking for and got it for £5 (it's a hardcover). It was great fun, and Neil rocked.

[badnewswade.livejournal.com]

(Someone please start a weblog called that)

I'll top that- I've just started The Worst Blog In The World!

http://the-worst-blog-in-the-world.blogspot.com

How d'ya like that for crappy blogging, "old media"?

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

Weblogging is wrong, authors keeping websites is wrong, writing stuff and putting it on websites is wrong
[grin] Except for those blogs kept by Neil? Also, Charlie Stross was rather keen on Bruce Sterling's blog.

Apparently I was attending the wrong panels ... [grin] Or possibly drinking with the wrong people ...

Admittedly, without the interwebs, the world of slash writers might have got less of the oxygen of publicity, and might have had more trouble sharing their ideas ... [grin]

[girfan.livejournal.com]

It wasn't just Patrick. Neil Gaiman and Chaz Benchley said the same thing. I must make sure he finishes it (or something like that). ;)

[eljaydaly.livejournal.com]

Beat him, will you? That thing was funny as hell. He was the star of VPX.

We need him to be successful so the rest of us can become favor-currying toadies.

[girfan.livejournal.com]

The star? I can believe it. He was on a panel at Orbital and got some laughs from the audience.

I want him to become successful, but hope he doesn't end up with too many fangirls. Though, he probably will end up with too many fanboys like Charles Stross. ;)

[hirez.livejournal.com]

I am interested in your product or service and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

[hirez.livejournal.com]

Oh, pish: Frog Sex and Killer Hats.

[andrewducker]

pffft, half of the "fans" don't read it at all any more!

[blue-condition.livejournal.com]

Indeed. Which is rather a paradox, isn't it? Embracing n00 m33ja but condemning those who use it to try to broaden the ghetto ;)

[surliminal.livejournal.com]

This con was big enough by UK standards to feel v Worldcon-ish.

[surliminal.livejournal.com]

How many panels was this impression based on? because like PNH, i think I was going to a different convention - one where espeically in my circles rooms were filled with fans chained umbilically to their laptops.
yes there are a v small proportion of short story writers and ancient fans who blame t'Interblog for the collapse and fall of the Roman Empire. But I think they're to be pitied (possibly a hug might help) more than mocked - like the MPA and RIAA, they're simply defending their own defunct business model, namely Becoming Stars via hard Copy. Soon enough they'll wither away, like socialism was meant to..
I had no idea you knew Lucy and Patrick. Small world huh...

[athenais.livejournal.com]

Good lord, I had no idea it'd gotten that large. Well, I'm just glad our host ended up enjoying himself.

Now, Señor Hirez, finish that book!

[hirez.livejournal.com]

The first two that I turned up for, so I was feeling somewhat dislocated by the time I came to write the original piece. (Now tweaked in the light of sensible discussion with sensible people)

I blame Viable (http://hirez.livejournal.com/164981.html) Paradise. (http://www.sff.net/paradise/)