hirez: Humppa! (Humppa!)
SHA2017 call for participation opens!
hirez: (Cooper-Clarke)
All the survivors of the secret department store wars of the 80s seem to be from House Fraser. I imagine that's actually a nom du guerre and their ancestral homeworld is Giedi Prime. You could tell that something odd was going on if you bothered to pay attention to the layout of the buildings, because nothing quite lined up the way you thought it should. You'd be looping up a central stairwell away from gentlemen's unmentionables and in search of mechanical Christmas decorations that played tunes on a tree filled with tiny anvils, when a right turn would end in a blank wall where a staircase should have been.

I never did find the mechanical decorations again. It was the eighties, so the level of compute and miniaturisation would have been impossible. It was obviously a mistake to leave it somewhere an Earth-native human could find it.

Mind, whenever I do go into Jolly's of Bath, I am disappointed not to be met by Peter Cook with apron and meat-cleaver and telling me to 'Fuck off out of it. Go on. Fuck off.'

That wasn't really what I was going to write about. Perhaps that post needs some more time to mature.
hirez: (dissent)
In receipt of a(n) SMS earlier in the week, allegedly from m'GP (who have quietly turned into a hopeless shower, which is sad) which went along the lines of 'We are updating our records and wish to know if you smoke. Please reply 'YES, EX or NEVER''

At first I was tempted to reply along the lines of 'Please send me your data-protection documentation and copies of any risk-assessments you may (or may not, most likely) have done, paying particular attention to the notion of wrong numbers, re-used numbers, shared mobile phones, nosy partners, stolen mobiles phones and the actions of News International. Bear in mind I used to hack on surgery-management kit and I don't imagine it's become any less terrible in the intervening years Honestly, what were you useless bastards thinking? Further consider that specific question doesn't usefully break down into the categories you think it does. For instance, I smoked moderately heavily between summer 1993 and ditto 1994. Now to a tiresome rules-lawyer, that makes me an ex-smoker. However, since I don't know what crap probability-of-expense patient-mortality forecasting game you're playing, I'm going to take it that cycling daily and being able to blow your lung-capacity test off its end-stop means I fit in the 'never' box. Christ, it's not like it was even hard to give up like all the adverts allege.'

But that would have been a right faff to prod in on the squitty Android finger-painting pad.

Then I thought to reply 'NEVER'); DROP TABLE Patients;--' but that would probably guarantee that I would be subject to regular and vigorous prostate examinations for the rest of my life.

In the end, I went with boring, nearly true and 'remember this for a piece to livejournal'. So there you go. I would be interested to discover if this is A Thing now.
hirez: (Armalite rifle)
[Poll #1789865]
hirez: (tank)
hirez: (Bunny Eye)
... Or at least, they're just papering over the cracks, rather than actually fixing something.

However, if Serotonin theory doesn't hold up, does that mean the scare stories about MDMA leaching the stuff away are as reliable as the folklore about LSD and chromosome damage?
hirez: (muddy)
Loath though I am to break the previous splendidness of this, it's worth it to point at this work of casual genius.

(Why yes, I do have the odd unfinished project scattered about the place.)


hirez: (Default)

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